Public Service Agrees to Implement Austerity Program


Public services are safe from the threat of a fair deal for four years. The kind of crippling cuts that were recently pushed through by ICTU, amounting to a 10% pay cut in some cases in the form of a "pension levy", are now almost certain to remain.

Rogue union leaders are unlikely to be tempted to give up their six figure salaries or comfortable placement after they have convinced their membership to vote against their own interests.

The two largest unions assured that their membership went along with the agreement; SIPTU membership voting 65% in favour, and IMPACT voting 77% in favour.

The acceptance of the Croke Park deal means public servants' pay might not be slashed for four years nor are they guaranteed to have their pensions disimproved unless the government feels that it would be a good idea to do so -- but a pay freeze will definitely stay in place.

Public servants may also get to work overtime or agree to worse working conditions if they want to "earn" back up to €2bn of their paycut.


There will be no compulsary redundancies if trade union members do exactly as they are told by the Government, unless of course the goverenment changes its mind - a contingency built into the agreement.

Some union leaders whose members rejected the deal privately threatened to ballot for industrial action yesterday if the Government imposed drastic reforms.

But other union officials who have a better relationship with the ruling class dismissed this as a "load of guff", claiming that individual unions are highly unlikely to act without the support of more important people.

The TUI has declared it will abide by a majority vote in opposition to the deal, but is not expected to withdraw from the committee, despite the fact that it is populated by sissies.  The executive of the TUI will decide whether to start on a campaign of industrial action later this month.

Based on ballot results, the overall majority of the union membership feel that the Governments' threat to declare war on them if they didn't submit was real.


This is a parody of the fair and balanced reporting on the issues given by the Independent:

Words: Gavin Gleeson